


Genie for Your Wish

by RavenDos



Series: Mishaps of Genie Keiji and Shoma [1]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Genie/Djinn, Attempt at Humor, Crack, Gen, High School, Keigenie, M/M, Pray for Keiji, Shoma is confused, unbetaed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2019-06-08 08:06:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15239052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenDos/pseuds/RavenDos
Summary: “Don’t you have anything more ah profound to wish for? You could end world hunger. Perhaps, world peace? World domination even if you’re into that. Something other than asking for a lifetime supply of cooked meat.”Shoma eyes him contemplatively, slowly tilting his head to the side.“Are you calling me shallow?”“No.” Yes.Or in which Shoma has pot and meets Keiji the Genie.





	Genie for Your Wish

**Author's Note:**

> I have a running tradition of posting a fic every birthday, so please have this Genie crack fic I wanted to get out of my system. No playlist for this fic but you can loop SNSD's Genie like I did.

__

Shoma tilts his head, observing the object he held in his hands.

“I have pot,” he says.

Had Itsuki stayed in their apartment and heard what his older brother said, he would have laughed himself silly at the meaning in English of Shoma’s misspoken phrase before correcting him. He would also have been a witness to something magical, extraordinary.

As it was he had gone out with some friends, and Shoma was left in the house with pot.

Well, one silver pot specifically.

Purple smoke was emanating from inside of it. He rubs his eyes because he swears he can see it start to faintly quiver.

Shoma blinks in confusion. He does not understand why there was smoke coming out of it. It’s not like he had tried cooking anything that day. He hasn’t even been to the kitchen since leaving the house in the morning.

He had just arrived from school, and saw the pot sitting innocently on top of the living room table and looking very out of place, so he picked it up, intending to put it back in the kitchen.

It had been innocuous enough, but then it started _smoking._

It reminded him of the one time he had been curious enough to try recreating a recipe of a meat dish. It resulted in Itsuki rushing to help by splashing water on the stove and opening all the windows to let the smoke out while Shoma cleaned up the mess he had caused.

Needless to say, it had _not_ been pleasant.

Shoma and Itsuki agree that eating out and deliveries are for the best. The microwave they have is a godsend, too for heating the food with no fuss and no kitchen fires. Itsuki likes to tease him about that incident often frustratingly enough.

The smoke currently coming out of Shoma’s pot wasn’t anything like the smoke that had come from his previous at attempt at cooking, however.

Smoke was actually the wrong word to describe it. It was more of a mist wafting out under the lid.

And it was a bright purple.

The pot starts shaking in his hands.

He drops it. Hey, everyone knows that a pot furiously shaking on its own and emitting mysterious purple smoke should be thrown away, right?

 It lands with a loud clang on the floor.

Shoma curses. He wished he had run away from it, but what if the apartment exploded or something because of whatever thing was in that cursed pot? Itsuki would be furious at him.

He does not know what to do and stares with wide eyes as the pot shakes so hard that the lid clatters off.

They don’t exactly teach you how to react to these types of situations in school. Not that it taught you how to do taxes or how to be a functioning adult either.

 

 

“What in the actual fuck?”

It’s a man.

A man came from the pot.

Shoma furiously blinks, hoping to wake up from this weird dream.

Nothing happened.

He is still there.

 The man looks insubstantial, skin bordering on translucent with that damn purple mist surrounding him. He had high cheekbones, black, hair and dark eyes that were staring at him as if curious.

“And what are you wearing?” Shoma blurts out.

He cringes inwardly because that was rude, but the situation is too surreal for him to bother about things such as politeness.

The man? The being? He looks down at the purple vest with golden fixtures and his white ruffled shirt at that comment.

“What’s wrong with my attire?” He says with a frown.

“Um, never mind. Sorry, but who are you?”

_And why did you come from a pot?_

Shoma would have asked _what he was_ and opted not to because he would rather not irritate a being that probably had freaky magical powers or something out of one of the cartoons he watches instead of studying.

The man fixes his posture, and to his surprise, bows at Shoma.

“I am Keiji the Genie at your service.”

He looks quite impressive with the purple outfit and mist surrounding his incorporeal form. Very genie-like. Shoma is almost disappointed in himself that he didn’t guess it at first glance. To be fair, a silver pot was a very odd thing to house a genie.

 

 

 

 

Keiji doesn’t let out a sigh. He just met his new human.

He looks so young. Keiji dreads the thought of having young humans find him and having the chance to use his power because the consequences are usually chaotic.

Of course, it happens to him anyway. Why must the universe be against him?

The boy was short. He had messy hair. Keiji would fix that in a heartbeat if he asked. He hoped he would even if it did make him look endearing.

He also looks shocked to the core which was understandable of course.

“You’re a genie that came from a pot. Does this mean I have three wishes like the stories say?”

 “Yes, you do,” he says patiently.

“And I will go back to that pot once I am done granting three of your wishes. Use my power wisely. I can give you what you want, your deepest desire, your wildest dream, your fandom fantasies and irrevocably alter what was once your reality,” Keiji dutifully recites the mantra every genie is obligated to prepare and deliver to the humans that found their vessels housing them.

“Anything? You can give me anything I want?”

“Yes, I can, and I will. Just tell me your wish.”

“And after my wishes? You can go back into the pot, and I can pretend everything was a fever dream or hallucination,” Shoma mutters to himself more than to the genie.

The boy bites his lip, thinking. Keiji hopes it’s something sensible and something good for the universe. That would be great.

“Okay, I have my first wish.”

He looks up at Keiji with an intense look on his face as he opens his mouth to utter his first wish.

Keiji’s magic gathers at his fingertips, ready to grant—

“A lifetime supply of niku,” Shoma exclaims.

The magic sparks flicker and sputter out. The golden light ebbs away into nothing.

The boy looks at him expectantly as if he thought cooked meats would suddenly come into existence in every corner of the room.

It’s even harder to contain his sigh this time around.

“Don’t you have anything more ah profound to wish for? You could end world hunger. Perhaps, world peace? World domination even if you’re into that. Something other than asking for a lifetime supply of cooked meat.”

Shoma eyes him contemplatively, slowly tilting his head to the side.

“Are you calling me shallow?”

“No.” _Yes._

The other sounds amused, but Keiji decides to deny it. He would rather not risk annoying his current owner? Master?

God, Keiji really needs to think of something that doesn’t sound like an innuendo or simply ask for the boy’s name. Being a genie is hard business. It was hard to just interact with humans again after spending what could have been an eternity in that damn pot even if it was very cozy inside.

He decides on the latter course of action.

“What’s your name?”

“I’m Shoma Uno.”

“Okay, Shoma. Is it fine if I call you by your first name or should I use an honorific, perhaps?”

“Call me, Shoma please. It’s odd to be called an honorific by someone who looks older than me.” _And is a magical being possibly centuries older than him and with infinitesimal power at those fingertips that doesn’t want to give me food._

“Okay, Shoma. Now consider carefully. What wish do you want me to fulfill?”

Shoma really thinks about this time instead of blurting out whatever popped into his mind. He is pretty content with life. He’s succeeding as an athlete. He lives with his brother who he gets along with. His family doesn’t struggle with money. He’s even passing his classes despite training and gaming most of the time.

Shoma has a good life overall, but—

Laughter and a bright smile comes to mind.

Then Shoma knows what he wants, or rather who, he wants.

“I want you to make Yuzuru Hanyu fall in love with me.”

Keiji inwardly cringes at that. Perhaps, he should have granted Shoma’s ridiculous wish earlier. He would honestly rather not do this. Human relationships were messy at best. He honestly prefers not to dabble in those kinds of affairs.

 

Not noticing the genie’s turmoil, Shoma continues with bright eyes and a wistful smile.

 

“He’s a third year. The captain of the baseball team. He’s so determined, hardworking. You can really tell he adores the sport and how dedicated he is to it. Friendly, too. He saw me play and offered a spot on the team even if it is my first year. He said he thinks I’m dedicated and a possible asset to the team. I said yes of course. He offers to help me with my math homework even though he doesn’t need to. Yuzuru is so beautiful. He has these intense eyes and when he looks at me I feel like I’m going to faint. His nose scrunches up when he smiles, you know. Oh, it’s such a nice smile.”

Keiji absentmindedly thinks that Shoma’s smile is nice too while listening to him ramble.

Shoma continues dreamily.

“He’s just so unattainable. It honestly amazes me that he actually acknowledges my existence? He’s my goal, the eternal idol for me. I know I don’t have a chance. But… maybe, that’ll change because you’re here.”

Shoma gazes up at him with those wide eyes.

_He looks like a puppy. If I say no, I’m going to make a puppy sad. And what kind of horrible being would make a puppy sad?_

Before he can even reply, Shoma gives him a sheepish smile and continues earnestly.

“Umm I don’t want Yuzuru to fall in love with me instantly or be bewitched to suddenly like me. I just…I guess, I’m asking you to help me woo him? Please. My friends would probably laugh if I told them about it much less ask help in making freaking Yuzuru “Golden Boy” Hanyu fall for me.”

 

“So—please help me, Keigenie.”

 

“I will.”

 

How could he not agree when those eyes had gazed at him so earnestly hopeful? And where did that random nickname come from?

 

Shoma does a fist pump.

 

He had certainly warmed up to Keiji compared to the shocked boy from earlier.

 

“You’re the best genie I’ve ever met,” he beams.

 

“I’m probably the only genie you’ve met,” Keiji replies dumbly.

 

He hoped he was. It’s only been a few minutes since he had emerged from his pot, and he is already wrapped around this puppy-eyed boy’s finger.

 

The silence is awkward for a moment.

 

“So, about that first wish...”

 

Keiji or as newly dubbed by his charge, Keigenie does not sigh. He groans.  What did he get himself into?

 

“There’s a condition, isn’t it? Like only one flavor. That would be fine for me. My favorite is…”

 

Keiji tunes him out. Being a genie is hard.


End file.
